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  Not bad, she thought, unpacking her bag as Larry closed the door. She’d already stored the diving gear Duke had rented on the upper deck after meeting Shaw, the first officer; Tink, another deckhand; Wayne, the medic; Linda, the chef and Jason, the engineer. She was anxious, feeling like a kid playing hooky from school and wondering, once again, how the ama show was going without her.

  Instead of pearl-diving these past two weeks, Kat had been amusing herself by going to counseling with Neptune Point’s human resources for “confronting” Yoko. But she hardly felt punished. She’d also been spending a lot of time with Duke, polishing up her diving skills on his dime.

  Kat plopped to her berth, spreading out her arms as her back hit the mattress. She inhaled the air, the hint of must and polished wood, then tuned in to the creak of the boat as it bobbed. Duke was paying for everything, and as grateful as she was, it got to her. Still, she could tell he was happy.

  Again, she tried not to think about why. Duke was a buddy, right?

  A swift knock interrupted her thoughts.

  “Yeah?”

  A muffled voice answered. “It’s your captain, here to officially welcome you aboard.”

  “Oh.” Kat zipped upward, scooted toward the edge of her berth, eager to meet the only crew member who hadn’t greeted her yet. “Come in.”

  As the door swung open, she prepared herself for the sight of a sea dog: an aged skipper with a sailor’s hat at a jaunty angle and a squint to rival Popeye’s.

  But what she got instead robbed her of a heartbeat.

  A tall, deeply tanned man in his early thirties. Under his white T-shirt and khakis, he had the roped muscles of an athlete. His light-brown hair was cut close, highlighting a green-blue gaze that could cut darkness like sunlight through seawater. With a notable lack of shock at her presence, he grinned at her, but his hand gripped the doorknob, the veins in his arm pulsing to the surface.

  For an endless, awful moment, they didn’t say anything, too busy staring.

  Finally, Kat drew in a breath, exhaled on a surprised, pained laugh. “Will.”

  “Kat.”

  A beat passed as they locked eyes again then glanced away. A whole volume of anguish, joy and disappointment was in that one look, and she couldn’t handle it—not after she’d spent so much time trying to forget this man. Not after the hurt from everything that had gone wrong between them.

  In the presence of Will Ashton, she felt like she was underwater, ultra-alive and afraid, heart crashing against her ribs, skin prickling with awareness and the detection of danger.

  Had Duke known Will would be here?

  Kat bit the inside of her lip. Of course he’d known. Duke was anything but careless or stupid. Unlike her.

  One of them had to say something, so she stepped up. “Well. A captain, huh? Wow. From a scrub on that Catalina diving outfit to pure luxury.”

  Tone down the sarcasm, she thought, standing because she felt much too inferior looking up so far to this man. She’d spent too much time doing that in the past, and she’d grown out of it by now.

  “I’ve moved up in life,” he said, obviously more comfortable than she was with this awkward greeting.

  A different grin slanted over his lips now. That damned, I-want-you-now-Kat grin that used to spin her head like a whirlpool.

  Just like it did right now.

  Kat nodded, trying to calm the bang of blood through her chest. Will, she thought, I wish you weren’t here, but it’s weirdly nice to see you.

  Jerk.

  “What’ve you been up to?” he asked.

  She busied herself by tracing a finger over the mini-TV. Stop, she told herself. Just stop it.

  She nixed the fidgeting. “Same thing I was doing last year. Work, play, conquering the world. You know. The usual.” Eternal pause. “You?”

  He spread his hands out to indicate the boat. Kat couldn’t help following his every move, remembering how those fingers had stroked her to sleep. How those palms had smoothed over her face when she’d needed it the most.

  How those hands couldn’t be around to comfort her when they’d gone their separate ways.

  She drew to her full, not-so-impressive height, raising her chin so she could give him a look that was half-casual, half-Can’t you see I’m over you?

  “You own this boat or what?” Something sank into her chest, drawing her heart along with it. Nice. The thought of him being a success, of him accomplishing all those ambitions he’d held so dear ate at her.

  “No.” He shrugged.

  With that one word, Kat knew she’d hit a tender button. Even as vindication—the realization that he was almost as restless in life as she was—settled through her, she couldn’t help the burning itch that choked her throat. Out of old habit, a silent cry for connection, she reached out to touch his arm, to make him feel better, just because she knew the mediocrity had to be killing him.

  But when he looked up, she caught herself, crossing her arms in front of her chest instead. Underneath her Billabong Surf T-shirt and faded jeans shorts, she was wearing a bikini. It made her feel too vulnerable, as if Will could see through all the material, see through her.

  True to form, he got that familiar cocky gleam in his eyes because he no doubt knew what was going through her mind. He’d always been real good at that.

  “But things are happening,” he said. “I’m working on owning my own rig.”

  “At least you’ve graduated to captain.”

  “And dive master,” he added, his jaw tightening.

  It wasn’t a quick enough career trajectory for Will, Kat knew. She’d never met a person with more drive and dreams. For a few short months, Kat had ridden his rainbows, too, believing that, someday, a fallen golden boy and a girl who’d been on the free-lunch program in high school could make things work. Sigh, right? But then reality had hit. He’d shown his true colors.

  And she remembered every nuance of their breakup down to the last, heart-shattering detail.

  She wanted to say something to wound him since she’d been saving up the anguish for so long. Something to reveal that she realized just how much his failure to fulfill his goals hurt. But she couldn’t, because she felt the same damned way about herself.

  Even after everything, she still needed him, dreamed about him, wanted him to live happy.

  “You look good,” Will said softly, jerking her attention back to the present.

  “And you’re still chasing the big pot of gold in the sky.” She wished she could stop herself, but pent-up frustration was getting the best of her. “I guess what happened with Captain Macintosh on your last sailing gig hasn’t stopped you.”

  Even at the mention of the dark rumor that had dirtied Will’s reputation personally and professionally, he kept his dignity. “I was cleared of suspicion for his death. He was a good guy, but a drunk. I can imagine what happened—him saucing it up and spilling overboard when we’d docked and most of the crew—except me—went into town for some fun. I was under the weather that night, in bed. I never heard the captain go overboard. And when I found his body floating nearby the next morning…”

  She knew. And even though there’d been mean whispers from Will’s old coworkers about how he could have benefited from the captain’s death by taking over the command of the luxury yacht Sundowner, she’d never believed any of the accusations. She hadn’t wanted to.

  Sure, Will had developed a lot of deep resentment because of what life had done to him and his family. Sure he had that temper, but…

  “You already explained,” she said, “back when…”

  Back when she’d made that lone phone call—just one—to see if he’d recovered from the rumors. In pure Will style, he’d assured her that all was kosher—that Captain Macintosh’s drowning had been ruled accidental and that he’d moved on by switching rigs. He’d claimed he’d wanted to work out of San Diego again anyway before Kat had said a stiff, I-can’t-believe-I-just-talked-to-my-ex-and-I’m-still-in-one-pie
ce goodbye.

  Kat shifted her stance. “It looks like you’re mingling with your type on a regular basis now, judging from this boat. The beautiful people, right? Have they welcomed you back into the fold, even after all the scandal?”

  “I wish.”

  For a naked moment, his gaze grew a little lost, revealing enough to allow Kat a glimpse inside: the wounded boy whose socially prominent family had fallen from grace because of a father’s dalliance with the wife of a colleague. The kid who’d witnessed that same father being taken down by the enemies he’d made, peg by peg, dollar by dollar, until there was nothing left but a strategic, tragic drug overdose. The youngster who’d raised his family, a man of the house before his time. The man who’d put his heart, soul and body into cleansing the good name his father had ruined.

  The man who’d disillusioned Kat during one pivotal moment, devastating her.

  As if barring Will from reaching her heart again, Kat tightened her arms over her chest.

  Mess me over once, shame on you. Mess me over twice…

  He must’ve caught the defensive hint because, suddenly, the cocksure captain was back, leaning against the door, all heartless, predatory grace.

  A slash of lamplight made the stubble on his jaw glisten. “So what’re you doing with the Harrington party?”

  Long story. And it was one she didn’t owe him.

  “Never mind that,” she said, clean out of patience for this unwelcome tension. “Captain, do you have any green tea on board? Hot tea for a cool morning, you know. Good for the soul.”

  He sent her a glance that told her he knew she was getting some petty revenge, capitalizing on the fact that he was in her service.

  “I’ll talk to Chef Linda in the galley.” He turned to leave then paused, grinning over his shoulder. “Funny,” he said.

  “What?”

  “You on my boat. The world works in mysterious ways.”

  He was talking as if there was a purpose to her being here, as if they could take up where they’d left off. It riled Kat, heated the blood until it hummed in her veins. Simmered under her skin, awakening her in places best left cold with Will.

  She walked to the door, rested her hand on it. “Don’t get too excited about the prospects.”

  He turned, then backtracked a couple of steps, almost like a magnet pulled to her.

  A dangerous tingle zipped through her. Dangerous because she didn’t want it, had spent a year trying to chase all the Will-tingles away.

  Without another word, she closed the door on him, noting his raised eyebrows.

  As she rested against the wood, she heard him chuckle, then walk away, leaving her and some awakened yearning for him alone.

  Again.

  When Duke trudged on board, hand on his abdomen and sweat beaded on his upper lip, Kat was watching her tea grow cold. In a chair on the top deck, she was taking in the morning sun as it nudged through the haze. In the meantime, the crew bustled around, readying for their departure.

  “You. We’ve something to talk about,” she said, rising to her feet to relieve him of his small load of gear.

  Duke managed a sheepish glance, tugging a baseball cap reading Harrington Enterprises over his eyes with a trembling hand. Not having any of it, Kat eased it off his head so she could really look at him.

  “So,” he said, calmly retrieving his hat and struggling to readjust it over his brow. “Would this be one of those talks like you had with Yoko?”

  “It could be.”

  They were both quiet as Larry the crew guy grabbed Duke’s diving gear and headed toward the lockers. Then, with a gently persuasive hold, Kat took hold of Duke’s Hawaiian shirt and guided him to a seat.

  As seagulls wheeled overhead with their pitched cries of hunger, Kat said, “I met our captain.”

  “Good.” Duke smiled weakly. “I was hoping you would before I got here.”

  “And…?” Kat braced her hands on her hips, waiting for a response that never came. “What the hell?”

  Duke paused, eyebrows knitted as if he was trying to recall a thought that had vanished.

  For a second, she wondered if his recent progress on the new meds had been erased. If he’d gone back to the confusion, the mood swings, the endless vomiting up dark blood…“Duke?”

  He blinked, smiled up at her. “I chartered a trip. And it just so happens that Will Ashton is the skipper.”

  Thank God he was okay. Now she could let him have it. “Dammit, Duke. Do you think I buy that?”

  He gestured for her to sit next to him, then laid a gentle hand on her shoulder. The contact had an immediate calming effect. Human valium, that was Duke to her system.

  God, if she could only find a man who combined all the nice parts of Duke and Will, she would never complain about the male species again.

  But Duke was Duke. A friend. An older friend. Someone who could never strike the sparks in her that Will did.

  Kat exhaled. “This is one of your fix-it crusades, isn’t it, forcing closure between me and Will?”

  There was a strained attempt to look innocent on Duke’s part.

  “Or…please don’t tell me you’re trying to get us back together or something,” Kat said.

  Duke stared at the dock.

  “Oh, no. No, no, no…”

  “Listen for a minute.” Sadness etched itself into the lines bracketing Duke’s mouth, his eyes. Taking his time, he laid it out for her. “I’ve heard it all from you, Kat, when you’ve got enough tequila in you. All the regrets you’ve had about leaving Will, all the times you’ve told me how much you miss him. You’re not going to be able to move on with any man until things are settled with the ever-present ex.”

  “If you’d been listening, you’d know I never wanted to go back to him—that he isn’t good for me.”

  Even though Will was innocent, the story of Captain Macintosh darted through her head.

  “We’ll know that for certain after this trip.” Duke shook his head. “The way you left Will…You packed up one night and never went back, never talked it out, aside from that one stilted phone call where nothing was ever really said. That’s no way to leave things.”

  “And I’m fine with how it ended.” There was an emptiness around the edges of her heart, a lifeless field that throbbed and ached with every remembrance.

  “Are you?” Duke asked. “Are you really fine?”

  His reassuring tone of voice persuaded her to meet his eyes. There was a warm, soul-stirring question lingering in the hazel of his irises, a sweet sense of protection from the man who’d once asked her for surfing lessons, the non-threatening mentor who only wanted the best for her.

  If you knew you weren’t going to be here soon, wouldn’t you fix things? his gaze asked. Use me as an example, and take care of this before you run out of time.

  Once again he was right, and she knew it. Still, she didn’t want to do this, didn’t want to be around Will, smell his skin when he got too close, remember the feel of his lips on her body.

  She wasn’t sure she had the courage.

  “That’s cute, Duke,” she said, relieved, drawn to that paternal concern. “Dump me and Will into the middle of the ocean where we can’t run from each other.”

  “Perfect solution.”

  “Spoken like the ultimate problem solver that you are. You know, there is a definition for people like you.”

  “Savior?”

  “Troublemaker.”

  He shrugged, grunting with the effort. “Only for the people who matter most to me.”

  Shaken by his intensity, she frowned. The odd feeling was back—the warning sirens telling her that there was more to Duke than he was letting her see. That maybe he had moments when being friends wasn’t enough….

  “After that phone call, Will tried to contact you,” he said quietly. “I’m sure he wanted a second chance. That’s why I’m doing this, Kat, because he tried and you didn’t let him in. You deserve the chance to close your file on him
. You deserve to move on and know for certain that your doubts about him were warranted.” Duke’s jaw tensed. “The way he acted when you told him about the baby just…”

  Shaking, she held up a hand, cutting him off.

  She didn’t want to remember that night: The news that she could be having Will’s baby. The shock on his face as he realized that he’d permanently connected himself to a woman who would only hold him back from blue-blooded glory, one who would only make him even more self-conscious about his efforts to bring pride back to his family.

  The sheer relief on both their parts when her pregnancy turned out to be a false alarm.

  Kat closed her eyes, wishing the memory away.

  “So you’re not going to desert me because of my meddling?” Duke asked.

  She opened her eyes again.

  “I should, you busybody.” But she wouldn’t. She wanted to make him happy, make him feel complete and valuable, just as she would for any member of her own family, if given the chance.

  Even if it meant avoiding Will for five days.

  Hell, she could do it. She had a stateroom, a DVD player, a shark cage to escape to…. She was a big girl who could deal. Duke was more important than Will anyway.

  Shooting her friend a smile to tell him she forgave his meddling, they regained their easiness. He was back to being good old Duke and she the girl who learned so much from him.

  But the word baby still hung between them, invisible and thick.

  Leaving the boat, she went to retrieve the rest of Duke’s belongings from his waiting Town Car. She then leisurely strolled back to the M. Falcon, listening to the clang of sailboat rigs knocking against masts, the slap of water hitting the docks. On deck, she found him rubbing his temples.

  Headache city, she thought.

  Just as she was about to lead Duke below deck to stow his stuff and get him into bed, they heard an energetic young voice behind them, accompanied by running footsteps.